home is where the heart is

I often find myself thinking of the phrase “home is where the heart is.”

It is a phrase that debunks the idea that a home is one physical space in which an individual resides. Instead, it argues that a home is where one feels the most love, the most belonging, and so on.

It’s a beautiful concept, really, and it is one that helps me to understand how fortunate I am to feel that way regarding two places.

Not everyone is lucky enough to have the experience of growing older in two entirely different places. I, for one, had the privilege of doing so.

I spent the first eleven years in rural New England. It was a place where everyone knew everyone. I resided in a small town with a population of just two thousand people. I learned to be imaginative and make the most out of what was before me, appreciating the small things and the simplicity of where I lived. My family, my first-ever friends, my youth—all New England.

Ten of my young adult years took place in urban California. It was so different from the simple, quiet life I was used to, but I fell in love with the city over time. The crowded streets, the fast pace—all things I grew to love. Now, here in California lie my friendships, the person I love, and my adulthood.

I have spent years wondering where my home truly is—whether it is back in New England or in California. Especially now that I have spent equal amounts of time in both places, I grapple with this even more so.

The more I sit with this question, the more I realize that the answer is both.

One place gave me my roots, and the other allowed me to grow.

So if it is true that “home is where the heart is,” I am one of the lucky ones. My heart is in two places, and therefore, so is my home.